Sonnet: Dauntless

[honorat]

by Honorat

Summary: A Sonnet! For the Pirate poetry meme! I blame geek_mama_2 for bringing this to my attention. My last 10-page chapter "Night Passage" in “Aboard the Dauntless” summarized into fourteen lines. My very first Petrarchan sonnet with the volte coming after the octave. Do I ever feel Renaissancey!



Blindly, she flings her hull against the night,
Fragile wood, reckless of ravening stone.
A creature tormented, her timbers groan.
Close-hauled and heeling hard, daring this flight
Into oblivion, through head seas’ bite,
She claws the current’s threat. The dark waves moan
And dash her decks. A banshee wails—the lone
Wind knifes her canvas, stinging, like cold fright.
She shudders. But his calm hand on her wheel
Asks her to trust that with him she will swing
Through wind and thunder's roar. Soon will her keel
Caress calm waters, soft breezes will sing
In her white sails. “Hold on, love.” A bell’s peal,
Fierce as her own heart, this stranger’s words ring.

Comments

[sparky-darky.livejournal.com]

I think it must be Fate-- she hates me. I come home from an entire day of English literature and Keats and his versions of others peoples' styles (thank God he finally made his own... >_<) and find... this.

Though of course, your poem is far more enjoyable and far less depressing. I find it quite admirable how your style did not feel at all restricted in a fixed-style poem, and also how well the rhyme scheme works. Petrarchan sonnets rarely work in English in my mind, but only in Italian.

Once again, ship personification is one of my favourite elements of your work. You have managed to capture the danger and tenseness of the scene, whilst making the Dauntless seem so vulnerable whilst being fearless. I also liked the image of a banshee-- it added to the unnatural atmosphere, and really amplified the idea of a threat.

The change of tone in the sestet came across well-- the sibilance in 'caress' and 'soft' etcetera made for a much more gentle atmosphere. It's interesting how Jack conjures up that kind of aura, but then I suppose it's the mark of a patient but brave person that can guide a clumsy ship through a ferocious storm for fifteen hours...

[honorat.livejournal.com]

The curse of the Petrarchan Sonnet strikes again! Mwaaahaaahahaahaa! The gallant Sparky-Darky must defend herself from a hail of iambs all the while avoiding the treacherous rhyme schemes and the deadly caesurae. Not to mention the insidious melancholy of the dying Romantics. Will she survive? Tune in next week when the Perils of Pentameter will be battled again by our fearless heroine!

I've been teaching Romantic Lit, so some of it must be rubbing off. The problem with the Petrarchan sonnet is having to find so many words that rhyme without sounding like you're scraping the bottom of the barrel and being ludicrous.

I'm glad this was better than Keats--did that sound like hubris? (ducks lightning bolts of the gods). He does go on to write some achingly beautiful poetry. I do like his sonnet "On Looking into Chapman's Homer".

The Dauntless is growing on me. I'm really rather fond of her. Writing this in her point of view was not in the plans, but the muse is a bit of a tyrant. Thanks for letting me know her personality is coming out--"vulnerable whilst being fearless"--yes, that's her.

That "aura" is how Jack seems to me whenever he looks at a ship he wants. That ending where he goes to the Pearl's wheel like a bridegroom to his beloved . . . *Melt* No wonder they do their best for him.

[sparky-darky.livejournal.com]

I am printing that first part out and sticking it in the front of my English coursework folder! ^^ That really made me laugh. Unfortunately, when I go to University I will have even more to do with Romantic poets, particularly if I get into Warwick... I suppose I bring it on myself, really.

I love most of Keats' sonnets, particularly '...Homer' and 'On Sitting Down to Read King Lear Once Again'. I love the odes as well-- they just seem more original and personal, and that's when his genuine talent comes out. But I'm getting sidetracked.

That's an interesting metaphor of Jack and the Pearl-- and one that fits so well. The ships really are very intriguing characters, and writing from their points of view is so fresh in a fandom that is, for the majority, not that full of decent fanfiction. Luckily, there are some real gems out there!